For a Quiet Diwali........

The biggest festival amongst Hindus, Diwali or Deepavali is here! While there is no stopping for the annual festivities, family traditions or Diwali Dhamaka sales and offers, this Diwali has seen many people vowing for a greener and cleaner Diwali. With the recent spate of fire accidents in many parts of India owing to fire crackers, an appeal has been made in public interest by various Government and non-government agencies including schools to observe a cracker free Diwali due to ensuing the air and noise pollution and solid waste generated from bursting any kind of fire crackers. Personally, while we’ve never been big fans of noise causing crackers and our Diwali evenings was restricted to lighting the relatively noiseless sparklers, flowerpots and earth twisters, but this time we tried to do away with those too! Though our eight year old, (who has always had his ear plugs on every Diwali) was not gung-ho about the idea initially, we are on Day 1 and it’s been so far so good! Believe me, it’s not just us but many kids on our street are rooting for a quieter Diwali ….may be it’s only a matter of time for the whole neighbourhood to turn our biggest festival into our biggest pro-environment endeavour! Well…think about it….. Diwali evenings are probably best meant for other ways of celebration ..…like may be revisiting the long forgotten bhajans (Abhay is wincing!) or may be catching the latest Bollywood Diwali release with friends and family…..(Abhay is nodding rigorously!)….other than causing noise and pollution! So here’s wishing everyone a cracker-free yet a dazzling Diwali!  

 

As much as I wanted to read “Diwali gift” by Shwetha Chopra and Shuchi Mehta, I couldn’t lay my hands on a copy just in time for my Diwali post and found the pricing of the hardback a little too steep going by Indian standards. Since we are on the topic of going green this Diwali, I am taking the liberty of sharing an inpsiring true story found in the October issue of children’s magazine, Highlights Champs, in its Goofus and Gallant section.  “A Quiet Diwali" by Ashish Jain. This is a story of the 14 year old twins in Chindwada, Madhya Pradesh,… Yash and Yashika Jain who are asked to address their school on the eve of Diwali. The teenage twins describe their  life changing experience of having visited the burn ward of a local hospital during the previous Diwali and were so moved that they jointly decide to boycott crackers once and for all. From then the children have been travelling around Chindwada spreading the message of a quiet and a cracker free Diwali! Just as they finished their address, the teacher asks the students as to how many of the students  plan to celebrate Diwali without crackers …..and you can only imagine what the response was! So are you and your little one ready for a quiet Diwali??   

Every vote can make a difference!

The country is engulfed in election fever as India votes from April 7^th to May 12^th to constitute it’s 16^th Lok Sabha, Indian Parliament’s lower house comprising of representatives of people from 543 constituencies country-wide. While this is the one of the important issues facing the adult world, our younger kids couldn’t really be bothered much!  Nevertheless, Abhay was intrigued as we headed out last week on polling day (April 17^th) including wheeling our 96 year old granny (which made national news!) to the polling booth to cast our vote. Since Abhay is now at stage where he can comprehend news and current affairs, I did read him a couple of articles on elections reported in a child appropriate manner vide Child Friendly News, a fortnightly newspaper for kids. I am not sure if he understood fully, but it is never too early to instill the importance of one’s own contribution towards a better country.  It is disheartening to see that while people don’t lose an opportunity to criticize or fault with the present state of affairs, they don’t make use of the opportunity afforded to make a difference. Of course, one may have a genuine reason for not being able to cast one’s vote, but going on a vacation taking advantage of the Easter weekend is certainly not one!

I was looking for a story to read on the value of one’s vote but couldn’t find one on the eve of polling day in Bangalore. But this week’s  Young World, the children’s supplement of "The Hindu" carries a story in its Quick read section on the importance of voting titled “Let your vote decide” by Ramapriya Ayyer. As elections were round the corner, Mr Gupta was busy reading the newspaper when his eleven year old son Anuj asks him as to what difference does it make if Mr. Gupta votes or not. Just then an altercation broke out downstairs owing to the new watchman Bhim Singh’s negligence. Many residents of the apartment complex were not happy with the appointment of Bhim Singh in place of the earlier watchman Sakharam, who Anuj felt was more efficient and helpful. On a complaint to the apartment association, the association decides to hold an election on the issue of the appointment of the watchman. Mr Gupta who was in favour of hiring back the earlier watchman Sakharam was hoping to garner enough support for his cause, including that of his friend Mr. Shekhar. But the election was evenly poised with many supporting retention of Bhim Singh as the apartment’s watchman. As all the members cast their respective votes and the counting process came to an end, Mr. Shekar was nowhere to be found. The Secretary then announces the election result to be a tie, to Mr. Gupta’s dismay. What happens after that is a vindication of the fact that each and every vote is important and does make a difference! With the sixth phase of elections being held across twelve states today …..all you Indians …..go out there and get inked!!  

The V-day debate!

 How many people realize that Valentine’s day is a day to celebrate love, not just romantic love but all kinds of love touching one’s life – the love of a mother, grandmother, a family member, a teacher, a friend and of course the love of a partner in a romantic relationship. But I am not sure what to make of the attempts to reduce this day to just “Lover’s day” and then juxtapose it with the execution of three of our most revered freedom fighters which supposedly took place on this day eighty-four years ago. While it is true that like many events, V-day celebration is an import from the West, but that doesn’t mean that we respect out freedom fighters any less or that celebrating V-day will make us any less Indian. Many facets of our current lives are inspired from world over. While there is no point in blindly following them, there is not point blindly decrying them either. Well, three decades ago when not many knew this day to be Valentine’s day, not many knew that February 14^th was a day when Bhagat Singh was executed either! So where does that leave us? After all, love for one’s country is love too..isnt it?  

So on the occasion of Valentine’s day, I picked out a story from the February issue of Highlights Champs titled “A Valentine for Nanima” by Anita Nahta Amin and art by Kathleen Kemly. Reenu missed her grandmother who lived on the other side of the world. Rinu felt that her nanima may forget all the good times they had shared together and so she decided to make Valentine’s card using a photo of her and Nanima and embellished with things she found lying around the house, like cereal box, red paper, cotton balls, etc. Just as she finished, she wondered if Nanima knew about Valentine’s day and decided to write a note about it. But not knowing how to write in Hindi, the only language spoken by her Nanima, she sought her mom’s help and learned that love is “ pyar” in Hindi. Reenu mails the package to Nanima and eagerly awaits her reply. But as days pass, she gets impatient and persuades her mother to call Nanima. A phone call to Nanima’s has them talking to all of the extended family, except Nanima. Nanima finally comes on the line and amongst all the commotion and disturbance in the telephone line, Reenu hears her Nanima say a Hindi word she recognized “Pyar”! Surely no one should have a problem with “Pyar”, isnt it? Happy Valentine’s day everyone!

Circus Circus!

The circus is in town and over the weekend, we took Abhay along with his cousins to the Rambo circus. Since Abhay has never really been to a circus before, he had no idea about what to expect from “Rambo circus” which is now playing in Bangalore. As we set foot inside the big red tent, it felt like déjà vu as I remember my parents taking me to a circus that was playing in Bangalore back in the early 90s and how my mother was much more excited than I was as she had grown up in a small town when the circus was one of the most popular and affordable forms of entertainment for kids and adults alike. Even today as I recanted the various acts performed at the Rambo circus yesterday, it was she who was bursting with questions like “Was there this….was there that?” as if to do a story on how the circus has changed over the years!:-) Well, one thing that’s changed is the animal antics now being restricted to that of the elephant, horses and other domestic animals like dogs and cats as opposed to tigers and lions of the yester years. Frankly, I’d much rather enjoy the dare-devil and death defying acrobats/stunts performed by trained artists than the witness the hungry animals being prodded into jumping through rings of fire! Anyway, the show put up by the Rambo circus was quite entertaining and featured a combination of several acts, including juddling, balancing, clown acts, acrobats and trapeze acts performed by artists from all over the world, with Abhay’s favourite being the bike ride in the globe (though a usual act in every circus…it was the first time for Abhay and that too “without his hands covering his ears), wheel of death (a thrilling act touted as the show’s piece de resistance)  of course the dog show put up by a pack of pomeranians! J

Since it was his first time watching a circus perform, it has to be a book on circus, right? Well, I could have picked up Dr. Suess “If I ran the Circus” but since I could lay my hands on the same,  I read a story from the Young World that had appeared a few months which I had saved for the occasion. “ Under the Big top” by Kavitha Sivaramakrishnan. The circus was in town and Roshan and Swetha went to the circus with their aunt, Mrs. Rao!  The show began with a parade of the performers, dressed in dazzling costumes with flags in their hands and the dangerous and thrilling acts drew gasps of shock from the audience – be it the girl on a rope, the hula-hoop, or the group on a cycle – all the acts were performed with precision. Roshan and Swetha learn that the performers' rigorous training  and practice to get their act right. Roshan wondered if the performers don’t get bored performing the same thing over and over again to which Mrs. Rao pointed at the artists’ faces which seemed to show their passion. As the kids watch the three hour extravaganza, interspersed with comic acts by clowns and the trapeze performance being the grand finale, they marvel at the effort of so many people it takes to put up a show like that. Mrs Rao concludes that circus works well because of team effort and talent and that circus has been around for such a long time that one needs to salute the indomitable spirit of the circus and its people who will continue to entertain people, no matter what! It is true that the circus will always entertain people from all walks of life! After watching a spectacular show put up by Rambo circus, here’s to their indefatigable spirit of performance and entertainment. Enjoy the circus in town people!

Celebrating Children's day!

Although children’s day according to the United Nations is celebrated on November 20^th    here in India, children’s day falls today, November 14^th, commemorating the birth anniversary of our first Prime Minister Pandit Nehru fondly known to children as “Chacha Nehru”.  I remember how eagerly we used to wait for this day as it meant a school day sans uniforms and classes! Children’s day once again assumes significance as our kids experience the same excitement in their schools!  Children’s day is celebrated in many different ways – with schools organizing fun events for their students, the state machinery announcing various welfare schemes for the benefit of children, Google dedicating a doodle on children’s day, offices celebrating the children’s day spirit by allowing its workforce to come dressed as children, various social networking apps calling for display of one’s childhood photos, and some public-spirited individuals distributing gifts for children at local Anganwadis, etc. So you may want to relive your childhood moments today, or pamper your little one a little more today  or do something special for the children in your neighbourhood…..don’t forget to celebrate the child in you …..who never grows up and whom you should never let go! Happy Children’s day to everyone!

I wasn’t planning on keying in a post on children’s day today, but so touched I was by a story that appeared in this week’s “Young World”, children’s supplement of “The Hindu” that I decided to share it on Onestoryaday. The story titled “"Time to celebrate"” by Srikala Ganapathy is about a class VII student named Madhu who recently moves to town and is new to her school. Madhu feels lost in the new set-up and seems to lose interest in her school activities. Though a bright student, her grades come down drastically inviting her teachers’ ire and criticisms, creating a huge dent in her self confidence. A new class teacher Ms. Veena, is appointed to Madhu’s class. Ms. Veena notices Madhu looking dull and lacking enthusiasm. As she probes further, she notices that Madhu has a beautiful voice and asks her to sing for her. Madhu delights her teacher with her rendition of “Vaishnava Janato” and earns her teacher’s appreciation. Madhu then confides in Ms. Veena that she loves music but her parents are too busy to enroll her in a new music class after moving to town. Ms Veena finds that Madhu is good at singing and that she deserves to feel good about herself, and thus decides to help her out. During children’s day celebrations the next day, Ms Veena put up Madhu’s name in the program list and asked Madhu to come prepared. At the program, when Madhu is called to the stage, her classmates and other teachers wonder whether Madhu really knows how to sing but all their doubts vanish as Madhu begins singing. Madhu gets a standing ovation and she feelst like a champion, thanks to Ms. Veena’s understanding that children’s day is not just for merry –making but celebrating each child’s sense of self-worth and individuality! With the same realization, wishing all our little ones…a happy children’s day! J

Happy Teachers' Day!

We all remember doing something special for our teachers on the occasion of “Teacher’s day” on September 5^th , when in school or even at college. But how many of us actually remember the same teachers as we grow up? For most of us, September 5^th is like any other day except for a few articles in the daily newspaper or a few dedications on FM radio! It’s only when Abhay came up wanting to make a card for his class teacher that I remembered my past teachers at school, college and law college. When in school, a class teacher plays a pivotal role in a child’s school year, both in terms of academics and otherwise – a class teacher can make it your best or the worst school year!  For instance, the first thing you look out for as the school reopens is who your class teacher is and similarly the  class teacher figures uppermost while reminiscing about a particular school year or during school reunions. In a recent meeting with school friends, it was fun recollecting all our class teachers from Kindergarten to Class X…..and we remembered each and every one of them! The role of a teacher can never be undermined - beginning from a more nurturing yet instructive role at primary and middle school to a more supervisory yet involved role in high school and finally to a more understated yet insightful role in college – a huge thank you to all  the teachers in my life!

This week’s “Young World”, children’s supplement of the Hindu has a Teacher’s day special and today I read “"Teacher's Pet?"” by Indira Ananthakrishnan  from it’s Quick Read section. The school reopened and Mrs. Verma was the class V teacher and as she was recapitulating the lessons from the previous year, she noticed that all  students had done well except Muthu, who was a C-Grader. As she made enquiries with other teachers as to what was wrong, she learned that Muthu, a bright student otherwise, was trying to grapple with the tragic loss of his mother who had passed away during summer vacations. So Mrs. Verma took it upon herself to help him overcome his personal difficulties so that he could concentrate and excel in his academics. Muthu after all didn’t disappoint his teacher and came third in his final exams. On teacher’s day, Muthu thanked his teacher with a special gift – his mother’s pearl bracelet! Years went by and Muthu graduated from school and went on to pursue further studies. Years later, on Teachers’ day, the retired Mrs. Verma received a surprise package from one Dr. Muthuraman, M.D….whom she instantly recognized as her favorite student Muthu! An inspiring story dedicated to all the teachers who shape us into who we are! Happy Teachers’ day to all the teachers! 

Back to school!

It’s the last day of summer vacation for Abhay and tomorrow he is all set to begin his new academic year in Class II. While I am quite relieved that Abhay will get back to his school routine, I am also empathetic towards his “last day blues”, something we all went through and probably in many ways still go through! J I confess I am also a little uneasy about getting back to the grind!  In a way, summer vacation was a break from those mad mornings, from homework and project assignments, from coming up with innovative lunch box ideas, from the strict bedtime protocols and all those trappings of having school going kids! So it’s not just the kids, but an end of vacation for parents too! Though I must say that Abhay has been putting up a rather brave face about resuming school after two and half months of summer fun….but tomorrow, we’ll know if it’s for real! :-) 

In order to prep him up for the first day tomorrow, I read “"First day of school"” by Nandini Nayar, a story I remembered reading in the Quick read section of Young World last year. Vidya wasn’t really looking forward to her school reopening the next day and her amma sensing the same narrated a story about her own first day at school several  years back. Amma admitted to bunking the first day of school one year, much to Vidya’s delight making her wonder if she could do the same! However, little did she know that it wasn’t such a great idea as  amma’s second day of school was in fact her first day, and it was a pronounced one at that as by then her classmates at school already knew what was happening and who their seat partner is going to be or how their class teacher was! That’s when amma decided that she would never miss her first day of school ever! In Amma’s words “trying to escape from scary things never works as the scary things only bigger, stronger and scarier!” A simple yet powerful message not just for kids….don't you think? Anyway, wishing everyone a fruitful and fulfilling school year ahead! 

The Mango season!

Last year this time I was lamenting over the fact that my son will never know the pleasures of savoring the most celebrated tropical fruit ever – the mango! It was almost a herculean task to get him eat a slice of mango. However, what I hadn’t realized was what could not be accomplished by a mother’s cajoling was effortlessly done by a grandparent’s pampering! Towards the end of the season last year, Abhay’s maternal grandpa had managed to feed him some luscious alphonso slices and apparently he couldn’t get enough of the king of fruits!  But what I hadn’t expected at all was that my little one who has an aversion against fruits in general, was in fact eagerly waiting for the mango season this year! Last year, Abhay just stood by watching us relishing mangoes, this year however he was the first one to dig in! But the only flipside is that he refuses to eat any other fruit other than the mango!

 To celebrate this rare change of taste, I had to read a mango story for my mango lover! Last year Tulika brought out a magnificent book titled “"The Sweetest Mango"”, but this year though I couldn’t lay my hands on any book, I found a delightful story in the May issue of Highlights Genies by one of our favorite authors Nandini Nayar titled “Meera and Kiran and the Mango story”. While enjoying the best mangoes of the season, Meera wonders where do mangoes come from, Kiran replies that mangoes come from the shop, Meera further quizzes as to where does the shopkeeper fetches mangoes from to which Ma replies from the trees. Kiran seems puzzled and wonders if there is a tree in the shop ( Abhay loved the illustration of a shopkeeper perched on a tree selling mangoes!) Assuming that all trees grow mangoes, Meera declares that she cant wait for their tree to start growing mangoes too when Ma clarifies that their tree is a coconut tree which can never grow mangoes. So Meera and Kiran set out to grow a mango tree in their garden which Kiran promises to take care and share his food. Ma then gives them a one-on-one on the essentials of gardening which the children follow to a T and before they know it, they are relishing the mangoes from their garden! An informative story to narrate as your little ones gorges on the king of fruits! Enjoy the rest of the mango season everyone!

Do it yourself!

 

While I was going over some math problems with my six year old a couple of months ago, I realized that he hadn’t fully understood the concept of addition of two digits numbers, whereas his school notebook revealed otherwise. When quizzed, he coolly replied that the answers in his notebook were copied from his friend’s. There wasn’t even a slightest hint of guilt or remorse over the same! In fact, my son didn’t even realize that it was wrong to copy answers from his friend’s notebook as opposed to attempting to solve the math problems on his own! In his own words, his friend was merely ‘helping’ him out…. and after all it wasn’t a test but only a class exercise! Of course, I tried to make him understand the value of doing your own work and that ‘copying’ from others is simply not done. But I realized that kids do not necessarily comprehend the difference between right and wrong on their own and thus cannot always be blamed for confusing the ‘unacceptable’ with the ‘acceptable’. However, it is incumbent on us parents to help them understand this crucial difference. While there exists a thin line between ‘helping’ and ‘copying’ it doesn’t take too long for the line to disappear and turn into ‘cheating’ and when that happens, it is we parents who are to be blamed!

Well, Abhay did realize his mistake and claimed to have solved the next day’s questions on his own which I hope is due to the fact that he understood that it was wrong and not merely because “Amma will get angry”! :-) Anyway, I couldn’t have found a more similar story than this one in this week’s “Young World”, the children’s supplement of “The Hindu” and so I had to read it to Abhay. “Parathas and Potatoes” is a funny story by Gayathri Krishnan with an important message for all kids. Vishay’s mother was looking at his notebooks and noticed a different handwriting in his science notebook. When asked, Vishay had no qualms explaining to his mom that the handwriting belonged to his bench-mate Vicky who offered to complete his notes for Vishay as Vishay was slow in writing down his notes from the blackboard and couldn’t catch up with the teacher. When his mom advised him that it was not right to ask his classmate to slave for him when he was expected to read and write his notes all by himself, Vishay assured his mom that Vicky was no slave but was rewarded well with Vishay sharing his snack box with Vicky. Clearly, Vishay had missed the point! So Vishay’s mom hit upon an idea. The next day during lunch, Vishay was surprised to see a brand new lunch box with a note “Dear Vishay, this is a small gift to Vicky!” Vishay assumed that his mother too wanted to thank Vicky for helping him with the notes and gave Vicky the lunch box filled parathas and potatoes.  Looking back into his lunch bag, Vishay realized that his mother had forgot to pack his own lunch! Before he could even think of asking Vicky for some of his mom’s parathas, Vicky had polished them off! Vicky offered his own lunch box of curd rice and beans but Vishay was not interested. That evening when Vishay confronted his mom, his mom shot back saying “If Vicki can do work for you, surely you can eat his lunch for him everyday……!.” and that’s when Vishay realized what his mom  had meant! The next day, Vishay turned down Vicky’s offer of completing his notes and realized that he could write fast enough if he’d put his heart and soul into it! A great story to educate your little one about hard work and doing things on his own!

Picture Gandhi!

What does Gandhi Jayanthi mean to a six year old?  It probably means a school holiday on the occasion of the birth anniversary of the bespectacled man on a 500 rupees note! What does Gandhi Jayanthi mean to an adult Indian? Frankly, all it meant was a welcome mid-week break from work….and of course Gandhi-Jayanthi related articles run on the Newspapers’ Editorial or Magazine supplements. For instance, yesterday’s Metroplus of 'The Hindu' carried a feature titled “Mahatma on the move” that highlights the numerous ways in which references to Gandhiji makes way into our day-to-day lives. Be it on Television (even on popular American sitcoms like Scrubs or How I met my mother) or in Films and theatre, or in terms of literature, either by Gandhi or on Gandhi or the recent Gandhian style of protests and finally with Khadi now making a fashion statement – Gandhi is everywhere! At the same time here’s hoping that Gandhian principles too travel from the textbooks to museums to touch our lives the same way!

Abhay may be a little too young for Gandhian way of life but he is old enough to learn about Gandhi and his way of life! So in an attempt to introduce him to Gandhi, I was looking for some age appropriate material on Gandhi. Trust this week’s ‘Young World’ to do a cover story on Gandhi! “Gandhiji – An inspiration” teaches the kids on the philosophy and values of the Mahatma, while inviting older kids (mostly high school students) to write about what inspired them to follow Gandhi. Another interesting book on Gandhi is “Picture Gandhi”, Tulika publication by Sandhya Rao, a book on the life and works of Gandhi through some rarely seen pictures. Starting with the quintessential, “One upon a time, there lived a boy named …Mohandas Karamchand Gandhi…” this book is a revelation not just for kids! This picture book (literally, so)  takes the readers, young and old, to all the different places and people on whom the father of the nation has left an indelible mark! Besides, the important events, this book also throws some light on the lesser known facets of Gandhi’s personality with the help of call outs and colorful embellishments while at the same time not trivializing his life that was a message for everyone! Not sure how much of this book went in, but this is sure worth a repeat-read, as Abhay grows older. “Picture Gandhi” is a must-read for young India, and hopefully not just on October, the second!  

No More Pencils!

School year has begun in full swing with homework and project work being doled out every other day. So Abhay’s school bag is now loaded with all his textbooks, his student diary, a homework book and his pencil box and gone are those days when all he carried was a dairy and a homework book – Ah! The travails of a STD 1 student! So just before he goes to school each day, I try to make sure he has everything in place, but for all my efforts, Abhay simply couldn’t care less! Every day my unrelenting five year old comes home with a missing pencil or eraser or pencil sharpener and has no clue as to how could he lost a brand new pencil that I had placed in his box just that morning! In other words, the kids these days are a pampered lot and have everything offered to them on a platter……so they hardly value them! Abhay for instance does not experience even an iota of guilt for having been careless and instead feels entitled to a new pencil, as a matter of right! I know…it’s just a pencil…..but there is no harm in inculcating these values early…..as tomorrow, it will be more than just a pencil!

In attempt to teach my son to respect and value his belongings, I read to him “For want of a pencil” a story by Rajalaxmi K Iyer that appeared on last week’s “Young World” a weekly children’s supplement of “The Hindu”. The author goes back in time to her school days when she lived in a joint family controlled by her paternal grandmother. The little girl was excited to be in class IV which meant that she would have to start writing in a notebook. The only hitch was that she didn’t possess a pencil yet. When she voiced her concern to her mother, her mother assured her that she will be provided with whatever was needed to start Class IV. As the school reopening date was nearing, the little girl was expecting her parents to buy her a new pencil but instead she was asked to manage with an old pencil that was only one inch long! So she hatched a plan and threw out her old pencil in the hope that her parents would have no other choice but to buy a new pencil. But she was wrong as her strict grandma rummaged through her uncle’s old stationery to unearth yet another inch-long pencil as a punishment for the girl’s carelessness. As her quarterly exams were approaching, the school teacher required all students to bring good pencils and erasers which was promptly conveyed to her parents. Finally, as her mother empathized with her and persuaded her father to buy her a new pencil. Just as she excitedly stretched her hand towards the brand new violet colored pencil, her grandma snatched it away from her only to cut the pencil into two and sharpens only one half of the pencil, as her grandma felt that the girl might careless once again, while her father watched helplessly! So all little Rajalaxmi wanted was a new pencil, while that was one thing she had eluded her! But finally, she gets her wish and her father buys her a new pencil, behind her grandma’s back! So …the next time your little one loses a pencil or a crayon in school……tell him/her about the story of the one-inch pencil! J

Mommy withdrawal symptoms!

Yesterday was mother's day and for the first time since I became a mom, I got to celebrate it without my little one! I thought I would quite enjoy my time alone at home (strictly speaking I am not alone ..but we are quite a houseful) ....or spend my evenings after work doing things I have always wanted to do but never had the chance to....watch TV mindlessly, read the day's newspaper without any interruptions and there's no hurry to hit the kitchen to fix Abhay's dinner! Well, I must admit....I am doing all that...but you know what the catch is? I'm not enjoying it as much....I miss my mommy duties.....I am having what can be called "withdrawal symptoms!" I cant stop myself from calling my parents to check on Abhay every now and then; I cant stop thinking of Abhay as I serve freshly fermented curds for dinner ( something we make for Abhay for each of his meals). I cant stop talking about what Abhay would be doing at this very hour in Dharmasthala! Abhay has had sleepovers at his grandparents' house in Bangalore before.....but this somehow feels different! I almost feel homesick without him around and  it is Abhay who is away from home! Oh God...look what being a mommy does to you!

This time around on the occasion of mother's day, I couldn't read to Abhay as he was in grandparents' farm house in Dharmasthala, which is an overnight journey from Bangalore. But while I was there last week, I had read an exerpt by Leela Ramaswamy in Open Sesame ( The Deccan Herald's children supplement) on Abraham Lincoln's mother titled "Angel-mother". This is a story of how Abraham Lincoln lost his mom at the age of 10 and was brought up his step mom Sarah. Little Abe and his sister lived in abject poverty along with their father Thomas Lincoln when he married Sarah, Sarah who had inital misgivings about stepping in as the wife of Thomas Lincoln, accepted his children as her own. She loved them and worked hard at transforming their home and their childhood into a happy one. Sarah was the force behind Abraham's education and success and for all that he had this angel-mother to thank! I guess Abhay is a little too young to appreciate a story a like this, but it definitely makes an interesting read! We all have our angel mothers to thank ...dont we? I have my mom to thank...specially now...since she has given me some time off from being a mom! Happy Mother's day to all you moms!

The Sharing Business!

We all know sharing is the most admirable thing to do and harangue our kids into doing it, but how many of us actually do it ourselves? Do we share the narrow road with the oncoming vehicles when it is possible to do so or do we assert our right of way? Do we offer to share a seat with a fellow attendee at an event with limited seating capacity or do we hold on our seat as a right? Similarly do we let our kid get away with wanting to hide a toy in order to avoid sharing the same at a play date? If you’ve answered No to the first part of each of the above questions, I have to further ask you if your answer is No all the time. I for one believe that sharing is not practical all the time and there is always a distinction between sharing your toy or lunch and sharing something that results in the pains taken to gain that something go in vain! While it is more practical to flash your headlights to signal the oncoming vehicle to wait, or try to safeguard a particularly expensive toy, the value of which none of the kids realize in their game of tug-of-war, it also true that kids are not circumspect enough to understand this difference. What may start as not wanting to share a toy may grow into not wanting to share anything at all!  Finally….I  admit that  I have never been great with sharing (Confessions of an only child!) and in this aspect, I hope that my son doesn’t turn out like me!

I discovered a wonderful story in Last Friday’s Open Sesame,  a children’s supplement of Deccan Herald that will probably assist me in my endeavor. "Care to share" by Leela Ramaswamy  is a story of a little girl who loves chocolates; Ranjini loves chocolates so much that she cannot bear to share them! Ranjini wins a prize in a word game at a friend’s birthday party and to her chocolaty delight, the prize happens to be a big box of shell shaped chocolates. She pops  one into her mouth and finds that it tastes heavenly. She couldn’t wait to get home to show her mom. On her way home, she suddenly realizes that her cousins Ajay and Rinku are visiting and her amma would insist on sharing her prize with them! She feels it’s unfair to expect her to share her prize with her cousins as she had worked hard to earn it! So as soon as she gets home, she tucks the box deep into the lower shelf of her cupboard away from the prying eyes of her cousins. After a few days, her cousins leave and Ranjini rushes to her secret hiding spot to retrieve her prized possession. She is shocked to find her entire shelf covered in melted chocolate and all her dresses smudged with brown. She bursts into tears as her mother comes in asking what happened. When Ranjini lets Amma into her secret, amma observes that Ranjini has already been punished for the wrong she has done that will help her  remember that it does not pay to be selfish and dishonest. So it’s not just about sharing chocolates but it’s about caring enough to share! Lets hope we all learn from Ranjini's experience.