Quarantine times!

 

I began this year like every year with a new year resolution to blog more often, but didn’t expect to follow it up in the same month itself (it never happens!). Similarly we all hoped to embark on 2022 putting the horror of Covid-19 behind us,  but didn’t expect the pandemic to catch up with us so quickly, and in such a lightening speed so as to have the  hitherto untouched/uninitiated / uninhibited caught unaware!  Neither did we all expect to test Covid +ve at a time when we (read.. I) have been indoors for the past three weeks nor did we even anticipate that the illness would first hit my father-in-law when he hasn’t stepped outdoors in the past whole year!   Well….it hits you when it hits you is all I can say as we got sealed into isolation as a COVID HOME last week!

After being locked in through the first wave, and braved the second wave, we couldn’t after all escape the milder version of the pandemic that had engulfed the city as a third wave, which is now on a decline just as we at home find that the worst is now behind us. From acute fever and exhaustion to slight temperature and weakness, from continuous to sporadic bouts of cough, each of us reacted to the virus in our own way, convalesced as our own body and mind allowed us to and recovered in our own pace …….thankfully all at home. With four of us being co-vaxined and covi-shielded from the severity of the infection, this variant has left us drained mentally more than physically, paling us into a general sense of gloom and dis-spiritedness…as quarantine can turn even the quiet into the querulous!! 😊

Well….the best way to bring some cheer back into our lives is to have happiness delivered to our doorstep  by none other than “Funky Rainbow” our favourite indie book store of South Bangalore. No sooner did the little gems get delivered than did our happiness quotient in the household begin to rise!  Quarantine times can also be a period of emotional upheaval for us as a family as we grapple with the physical symptoms of the illness with willpower and emotional strength and what a better way to remember these trying times than this wonderful book that’s not only makes for a great read aloud book for children but also enables us to reflect on our emotions as adults. “Are your emotions like mine?” by Chitwan Mittal and Shruthi Hemani  is narrated by a little girl trying to understand what she feels every day from excitement to anger, from feeling silly to feeling nervous, from being proud to being adventurous! There are a host of emotions that we experience and reading about it not only serves as an acknowledgement of our own feelings but also a step forward in trying to understand and get comfortable with what we feel, why we feel and how we feel and express our emotions. Aided by brilliant illustrations , the little girl and her lion’s journey into their emotions was an instant hit with my little girl who couldn’t resist drawing her own version of what she feels! Here's to our emotions! 

Angry "A"s!

What makes you angry? When your clients dodge paying up after extracting all the work from you? Or when you feel your entire weekend being devoured by your kids leaving absolutely no 'me-time'?  Or when your little sister is a ubiquitous presence at home, staking claim to all of your parents' attention? Or when you are not allowed to snack on your favourite junk food (which happens to be right before dinner time!)........ these are a few reasons that makes us go all red and hot! Off late, both our 'A's (as we fondly refer to our kids both whose names begin with the first alphabet) have been experiencing certain anger issues in their own way........if one is transitioning from tween years to teens.... the other is moving from thunderous threes to fussy fours!! While we dialed in  for "Toddler 911 techniques" for the latter, for the former we decided to introspect and look within and like most children's issues....it's no surprise that this too stems from the parents! While anger is a natural feeling when things don't go as expected, it's how we choose to react and express our anger that has a direct bearing on how our kids let their steam out! We yell and they yell, we abuse and they abuse, we curse and .........well.....they'll think cursing is cool!

Of course, avoiding all kinds of outbursts or shouting-matches is easier said than done, and it's convenient to let it slip a few times and blame it on children themselves or rationalize the same as parental authority! But seriously...who are we kidding? They are as we are and they will turn out as we have turned out. As the saying goes ....children are great imitators...so give them something great to imitate!

As we all learn to deal with our own anger management issues, I discovered an insightful little children's book on the same subject by Pratham publications titled "Angry Akku" by Vinayak Verma. Recently awarded the Hindu Young-World Good Books award for the Best Picture book: Story category, this book is based on a theme that transcends all age groups and makes a delightful read for one and all.  Even the name of the little girl reminds me of Kannada author Vaidehi's story of a strong willed woman named "Akku" with her own anger management and mental health issues that was even adapted into theater and later a movie. I wonder if the author drew inspiration from the same....!

Anyway, as little Akku is picked up from school by her father, he notices that Akku is not her usual perky self but is upset over something. Nothing seem to cheer her up...if the sun flowers on the way are "too yellow", the monkeys on the roof of her house are "Chee!" Nothing that appa has to offer softens her mood..... and though she refuses to down a glass of buttermilk or crunch into the crispy vadas.... on second thoughts  she polishes off the plate in no time!  Despite being in an unenviable situation, I envy the father's ability to stay patient and adopt a therapeutic  approach to letting Akku's anger subside! Why is Akku angry or most importantly, does Akku finally cool down?  Read on to find Akku's  annoyance melting away as she turns from Angry Akku to Artist Akku!  Aided by vibrant and imaginative illustrations,  and endearingly relatable portrayal of its protagonists, this book is truly one of the best picture books in recent times! Even on a personal level Angry Akku is a big hit at home as I see my little one imitating Akku in one of her own angry avatars and my older one trying out the ten best things suggested when he feels angry like Akku and  our lives are all about juggling between them as we learn to deal with our own angry-Akku-moods!    

Feeling argumentative to zestful!

I had earlier complained that people in India are not so generous with their smile and I hadn’t the faintest idea as to why! Well, I had to eat my own words as I thereafter experienced the not-so-welcome side effects of smiling at a perfect stranger in India! :-(  Anyway, off late I found that the same reluctance to break into a smile has rubbed off on my little one too! The other day his paternal grandpa (who picks him from his school bus)noted that Abhay is always grumpy as he gets off his school bus in the evening whereas his schoolmate getting off at the same stop is always cheerful and smiling!  I am not sure what’s going on in his mind as he gets back home or from where he picks up his “moody” attitude of his (Oops….mea culpa!), but I realized that it is important to help our kids develop a cheerful disposition as this will go a long way in cultivating a positive attitude towards  life in general. It goes without saying that children learn a lot by imitation and this means as parents we must exhibit and exude positive energy ourselves and of course …smile a lot more…….…even if it means returning home from work to find the whole house a mess, all thanks to your little one’s experimental play! J

After much prodding, Abhay now understood what his paternal grandpa meant ….and now when he gets off the school bus, he flashes his most brilliant smile! J So today Abhay read “The Grumpy Bird” by Jeremy Tankard, of the "The Boo-hoo bird" fame. It got me nostalgic as we won this book at summer reading challenge organized by the Hillsboro library two summers ago and I now seek to feature this book for the 30 books in 30 days challenge promoted by Bubble ink, with today’s reading prompt being “feelings”. Bird woke up with a grumpy mood – too grumpy to eat, play or fly (sounds familiar?). So what does he do? He decides to walk  and soon other animals like the sheep, beaver, raccoon and the fox join in and lighten up bird’s mood  and making him forget all about his grumpy mood. A great book for toddlers and alike and an ideal read when they wake up with a foul mood!

For older kids, I found another wonderful book on feelings (a chance find actually!) titled “A is Amazing”,  edited by Wendy Cooling and illustrated by Piet Grobler. This is a unique anthology of poems by famous poets on various feelings presented in an alphabetical order, some of them being - amazing and argumentative for A (featuring the poem “Argumentative” by Carol Ann Duffy), B for bored (“To pass time” by Richard Edwards), D for dreamy(“An Owl flew in my bedroom once” by Jan Dean), I for inquisitive (“An Enquiring Mind” by Douglas Houston), M for magical (“Isn’t my name magical" by James Berry), N for naughty (“A song about myself” by John Keats), O for original (“Celebration” by Ann Ziety), P for Puddle-wonderful (in Just by E.E.Cummings), S for secretive ("Secret" by Emily Dickinson), U for unpredictable, ("Sun is laughing" by Grace Nichols) and  Z for zestful ("Who is de girl" by John John Agard) and so on. This book features a poem for every feeling that is also brought out beautifully by way of simple yet vivid illustrations. Though some of the poems may be a little advanced for your young reader to relate to, each of the poems however are little gems you’d not only love to read and reflect yourself but also read aloud to your young reader. I am not a great poetry fan but this collection was truly a delight to devour!  Whatever is it that you are feeling...chances are that you'll find a poem that best describes how you feel! Guess which was Abhay’s favourite poem ? R for rotten featuring “I’m in a Rotten Mood” by James Prelutsky! J

Wont you smile....!

 

Once you’ve lived abroad, especially the US, you get accustomed to nodding or smiling at strangers; Wishing “Good morning” to a fellow jogger on your morning walk, or waving at a fellow driver who yields to you at an intersection or simply smiling at someone you’ve never met simply because you share a seat on the subway! It is not uncommon to  even strike a conversation with someone while waiting for the doctor, or waiting on your kids at the park or a swimming class, or waiting in line at a grocery store. Well, it’s a different matter that the conversation may last only for a couple of minutes or that it may be about something as inane as the weather or the kids in general. But it does leave you with a pleasant feeling, at the end of your short encounter. In fact, I hadn’t realized the power of a smile or a simple ‘hello” until we moved back to India – the land of grumpy faces! Leave alone smiling at strangers, folks here don’t even say a hello, even if you bump into them every day!!! Your eyes may meet every day as you drop off your respective kids to same bus stop or the same music class, or you live in the same community, or you visit the same grocery store – but its still a crime to smile until you've been formally introduced! :-)

Anyway, off late, I have noticed that Abhay is equally guilty of not warming up to other kids he meets. As soon as he sees someone his age in the park, his instinct is to cross his fingers meaning “two” ( You’ll know what I am talking about, if you have studied in Indian schools! For those of you who haven’t had the good fortune to go to an Indian school – it means he no longer wants to be friends!) So as soon as I learned about a book titled “Siri’s smile” by Amarendran R and illustrated by Bhakti Phatak, I immediately placed a request for it and was delighted to discover that it has become one of Abhay’s favorite books. Set in a rhyming prose, this is a charming little story with vibrant illustrations sure to everyone to ..well  smile…..from three year olds to thirty year olds alike. Siri, a curious little princess of Chennaipuri, is always asked to smile. One day, when no one is watching, she slips out of her palace and wanders into the garden. When she looks up and finds the sun shining in the sky, she asks "Smile Sun...wont you smile?"  But the sun replies that he can shine and burn but smile he cannot as he is hot! Disappointed, Siri then moves from monkeys to peacock, from the  moon to the fish…..asking all of them to smile but no one obliges. As she sits by the pond, she sees a little girl’s face in water and asks her to smile. To her delight, the little girl smiles back and as she Siri waves back, the girl in water waves back too and Siri is happy! From that day, nobody asks her to smile as Siri always has a smile on her face! So….smile Bangalore….Wont you smile?