Friday, April 1, 2011

Face the consequence!

I hate being the follow-up parent - waking up Abhay in the morning, making sure he eats well, driving him to various classes, getting him to do his home-work , ensuring he gets the required amount of sleep, so on and so forth!  This sort of elbow greasing work stresses me out and makes me lose my temper at times. Of course, my husband helps out a lot but the follow-up job is primarily mine….no one wonder I sound like a nag and Abhay doesn’t like it and neither do I! As much as I dislike being behind Abhay’s back all the time, I find it hard to let go and feel envious of the moms who take it easy. So today when Abhay woke up in a foul mood announcing that he didn’t want to go to school or swimming class thereafter, I decided to cut loose. I let him do whatever he wanted – he had no intention of even brushing his teeth or having his morning milk and all he chose to do was coloring and scribbling on his drawing pad. Though I appeared to be cool as a cucumber, my mind was in a war zone! I was debating whether to let him carry on or put an end to this forced holiday. Was it right on my part to let him miss school for no reason? Am I sending a wrong signal? What if I didn’t have a choice, like I had to rush to work or something? Another part of me was saying, "Relax, it is just for a day and not a lifetime!! Anyway, I let him face the consequence of  his actions and he learned a lesson the hard way or so I'd like to believe. 

In the book that I read today, the mother hen is faced with a similar situation and she decides to let her chicks realize on their own! “Chicks run wild” by Sudipta Bardhan Quallen and illustrated by Ward Jenkins can double up as a bedtime book too. It is time for bed, mama hen tucks her little in, kisses them goodnight and as she leaves their room, do they fall asleep? No, the chicks run wild! They cant stop playing, swaying and jumping on their beds until they hear their mama’s footsteps. When mama peeks in, the chicks are back in their beds pretending to be asleep. But when mama turns her back, the chicks run wild once again but are caught red-handed by their tired and angry mama. When they try to give mama an explanation, mama demands an invitation… now its mama’s turn to run wild with her chicks. As mama dances and prances all night, it was the sleepy little chicks’ turn to plead “its bedtime please” and at last  mama finds them in their beds fast asleep! 

So coming back to my story, did Abhay finally stay back at home? Abhay soon realized coloring was not as much fun as he thought it would be and begged me to take him to school instead. The result – Abhay went to school an hour late skipping his morning breakfast. Did he learn a lesson…not sure…but for a change, his lunch box was polished off clean and clear!:-)


  1. Divya,
    I know it is difficult to allow them to do on their own way.But for achange it is o.k.The last sentence is the reward you get for that!!

  2. That was one tough call...but u handled very well...self-realization always works..I think u r a wonderful mom to Abay!!lucky boy..:-)